Much has already been written about the Millennial generation and how to put up with their demanding “I’m special because I’m here and there’s more I can teach you than you could ever teach me” attitude. They don’t seem to have the inherent commitment previous generations did to simple things like arriving at work on time, dressing professionally or doing something just because they’re told. And we’ve heard that if you cross them, you can expect a call from their mom. In a nutshell, they’ve been labeled as free spirits who are disrespectful, lack commitment and can’t be led.

I recently had lunch with a colleague who was at the end of her rope managing millennials. I shared my own frustration and recent experiences with young people who have no idea how to engage in simple acts of civility (like taking their fingers off the text keys on their phones long enough to hold open a door) or to respect tradition. I told my friend I was going to research and write about millennials’ bad manners and more about how today’s lack of civility can be blamed on recent generations’ self-absorption…But you know, when I stopped to think about it from my perspective as a mother of two millennial boys and manager of millennials I love as if they were my own, my perspective shifted.

Sure, there are things about this generation that are alarming. Even among their own ranks, they admit there are things they need to work on. They aren’t used to hard work and most of them haven’t ever done “chores”. Understanding how to navigate the demands of the corporate culture and to respond to bossy baby boomers is difficult for them.

Then again, the greatest generation (which I love and admire) discriminated against women and minorities; often spent their lives working tirelessly at the same job only to end up with a gold watch and a small pension; and gave rise to corporations that not only failed to appreciate the sacrifices of their middle class workforce, but also in turn sacrificed the environment and economies of the world in order to achieve maximum profit. You see, if you look at something from a broad enough perspective it is full of many truths.

That being said, here are some of the “truths” about millennials that I’m thinking of in a new light…

• Large corporations have had to retrain their managers to be coaches rather than bosses in order to appeal to the sensitivities of the millennial generation. Hooray!! I would much rather be coached than bossed…wouldn’t you?
• Supervisors are being told to focus on personal recognition and saying please and thank you to their employees. I know…all this training and changing our ways is hard for us who were part of the old “because I said so, that’s why” school. But what parent of a millennial  can’t sing along with the Barney song, “Please and Thank You, those are the magic words…” Barney was right, kindness and good manners are magical! Manners are a great equalizer because they allow everyone to be treated with respect.
• Millennials are willing to adapt to new situations in order to try new things and don’t mind if their resume boasts four different employers in one year. Businesses who want to keep young talent must make work more flexible and appealing. Woah…a work place that understand that “benefits” don’t just take the form of a salary package? I don’t know about you, but I’d work a lot harder for a boss that gave me a flexible schedule and acknowledged that my real life doesn’t end when I punch in every day.
• Friends and lifestyle are more important to the millennial generation than work. I wonder how they figured that out? Maybe, as their parents survived one wave of layoffs after another, this generation saw that the things that counted were friends, family and the health to keep embracing it all.
• Millennials are completely at ease with technology and are plugged in to every new device available. True, it sometimes seems as if they were all born of a new species with white wires stuck in their ears. However, I am in awe of their multi-tasking ease. You know, any one of my nieces can run a spreadsheet for her boss, add items to a calendar, update her current status on Facebook and send in her new que list to Netflix within the time it takes me to type this sentence. And who do you call first when you have a computer issue at work, the IT department or the millennial across the hall who will help you just because he can?