Peace and Politics

While I don’t generally include politics in conversations about the practice of peace, this week, it seems appropriate.

Since practicing peace is an important ability in times of stress and contention, it seems the current political climate requires our skills as peace practitioners more than ever. Critical to peace is understanding (not to be confused with agreement) and understanding comes from listening. Therefore…

Step One     Listen.
We talk about this a great deal on this blog…that there are many ways to be right; to remember the costs associated with winning when you’re determined to win an argument; another perspective may bring valuable insight; yah dah yah dah...but all that seems to be lost today amidst the din of politically-fed debate. It’s not communication—communication engages the ability to listen as well as to speak in order to further the process of understanding. It’s just noise. So rather than contributing to the noise, peace practitioners need to listen with the intention of understanding. It’s amazing what a great effect this has on conflict. We each want to be heard, and not just to be heard, but to be understood. As much as we desire this for ourselves, imagine if we can offer that gift to another—especially one with whom we do not agree.

Step Two     Discern Fact from Talking Points.
I was greatly disappointed recently when I attended a community meeting with my father and his congressional representative. Initially, it was so refreshing to hear the Congressman talk about overcoming party affiliations to move great initiatives forward, mutual respect across party lines and the dissolving of differences on many issues. But within seconds of taking the first question, his tone of voice changed and the speed of delivery escalated as he began dictating party talking points on issues, rather than sincerely listening and responding to questions.

I spent much of my career crafting talking points and working to insure that we effectively layered opportunities to relay corporate initiatives and priorities to our constituents. However, the talking points served as an introduction, not the conclusion. Today, search for Talking Points on the Republican and Democrat party websites, or the Tea Party site or the site of virtually any major grassroots organization and, voilà, everything you ever needed to sound articulate about the cause pops right up. And it sounds remarkably similar to what all the “experts” say in news interviews. In fact, one begins to wonder if anyone really knows the facts, or if they have just rehearsed the talking points.

Facts aren’t just important nuggets lying beneath the veneer of talking points, they are also an emotional diffuser. When people are whipped into a frenzy, chances are they are responding to something emotionally-based—an accusation; an inference; a frightening story—and stemming from second-, third- or fifty sixth-hand information. To help center yourself in a more peaceful place and to guard against making assumptions, ask yourself (or someone else), Is that a fact? If it’s a statistic, tread carefully. Most statistics are only reliable if they are gathered in the absence of variable factors, account for significant outliers and have some standard of validity. Too often, a random sample is surveyed, a statistic gleaned and a sound byte produced with absolutely no factual framework. This technique is especially dangerous when it is accompanied by 3D animated colored graphics!

If you need a sound byte, remember these two great quotes from Mark Twain:

“Facts are stubborn things, but statistics are more pliable.”

“In religion and politics, people’s beliefs and convictions are in almost every case gotten at second hand, and without examination.”

Step Three     Diffuse.
When you find your emotions rising, equip yourself with an exit strategy so you can leave the conversation. I say, “Is that a fact?” out loud sometimes, (in a pleasant conversational tone that is unoffensive to others and a reminder to myself to seek truth.) Or, I might say, “What an interesting perspective!” Often, it is! Because I don’t share their perspective doesn’t mean I don’t honor the commitment they have to it. When you’ve returned to your peaceful center, you can choose either to part gracefully and walk away, or you can reengage in listening with a sincere intent to learn rather than to win. I have found that in sticking with some difficult conversations, I wound up finding wonderful bits of common ground I shared with the other person. Then, rather than letting all our differences swirl around and divide, I could build the foundation of my relationship on that little patch of common ground.

Long before the Civil Rights movement was a popular cause, Louis Armstrong attempted to remind us that we’re not all that different. Maybe that’s a good place to begin to practice peace in politics. Some Native American tribes would wrestle with tribal issues for days attempting to answer just one question, “Is this good for our children?” In the end, the majority of us have the same goals. In the beginning, it’s important to approach one another with peaceful purposes and the goal to grow goodness.

Listen to Louis Armstrong as you meet those who are like-minded, and those who see the world differently. Just say Hello Brother.

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